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Friday
Aug272010

Video Poker Ninja

So, I play video poker.     I don't just play it for fun, I play it for profit.   I learned to play "perfect strategy" a few years ago, before I moved to Vegas.    Perfect strategy is playing the game in a certain way in order to obtain the highest percentage of probable payback on that machine.  It's all about the math.    You have to know the perfect strategy, find the right machine with the right paytable, and have a bankroll big enough to get you through the volatility of the game.  Volatility is the ups and downs, wins and losses....a  rollercoaster effect, if you will.  Most people can't commit to all three steps, and eventually lose and give up.   Some people, though, such as myself, supplement their income with video poker play on a regular basis.   And since I don't have any income right now, my video poker play has actually been helping us pay the bills.   It's a good part-time job for those who can keep a cool head and stay the course.    A couple years back, I was not that person, and lost a hell of a lot of money (not to mention my pride and self-esteem).     I didn't commit to the 3 steps and was doomed to fail.   Oh I had the perfect strategy down, and knew the exact machines and paytables to play!      My failure was that I became greedy and played beyond my bankroll.  In my case, that meant I played at the dollar level when I only had bankroll for the quarter level.    I quit playing at all for a few months after that, because I was disgusted with myself and the whole video poker business.     After being laid off, I did start up again, only this time I strictly stayed at the quarter level and within my means.    I have consistently been successful and it has helped us out financially, considerably.       It has become my personal mission to succeed and I have to constantly keep myself in check to do this.    I jokingly call myself the "video poker ninja", which somehow validates it all and keeps me in line.     I don't recommend this plan of action to anyone;  it works for me because I am not going to let anything control me.     Just thought I would share this while I'm having a lovely glass of  merlot   (truth serum!).      If anyone out there wants to learn how to play "perfect strategy", I recommend buying a good video poker software program, such as "Bob Dancer Video Poker"  by Bob Dancer  or  "Frugal Video Poker" by Jean Scott.   Then you need to practice, practice, and practice some more.    Each type of video poker game has a different play strategy, and some are quite complex.   For example, Double Bonus Video Poker has 40 something rules to remember, in comparison to 18 rules in Jacks or Better.   Becoming a "video poker ninja" takes some work.     If you don't want to put in the time, just play for fun and enjoy yourself, but only play with money you can afford to lose.      Any questions, just drop me a note.    Peace.
Friday
Aug272010

Confessions of a Self-Proclaimed Purse Whore

Well, the title just about says it all, doesn't it?     Yes, folks, I am a purse whore.  I really don't know how it all came about, as I wasn't always this way.   I'm not acting my "lesbian" self at all!      I like to think I'm a little bit on the butch side  (and proud of it!).  For those of you that have no idea what a butch lesbian is, I will only explain enough to get my point across for this particular post.   A butch lesbian is usually not extremely fashion-conscious   (and I say usually, because there are exceptions, I'm sure).    I don't really care about fancy clothes or shoes; I just want them to match and fit and that's good for me.   I wear minimal make-up and would only wear a dress if I absolutely have to.    For me, comfortable is the operative word here.   I don't go for fancy hairdos, either, but mostly because I hate that fucking curling iron!   So, for me to become fascinated with purses is really too weird and I can't explain it.  I've just simply given in to my desires.      In the past, I only  carried one purse, usually basic black, and used it until it wore out.   Now, however, I can't walk into Kohl's without checking out the purse section.       I really can't remember how many there have been or for how long this sickness has been affecting me.  It's been at least a couple years now, though.    Here's  a sweet little number I picked up back in May of this year............just couldn't help myself:

Isn't she a beauty?     My reasoning for buying this purse is that it had outside pockets on each side, one for my phone and the other for my sunglasses!    But the REAL reason for my obsession was all the sparkles and shiny stuff dangling off it.    The texture is snakeskin-like, too..........ohhhhhhh my!!     (getting shortness of breath now; must calm down).

Then in June, I had to go back to Kohl's for something  (can't remember what), and found myself smack in the middle of all those beautiful purses again.    This time, I tried to resist those shiny ones, and opt for a more practical one.   I do, after all, have a big trip coming up and need some functionality, you understand.    So, this reddish/brown little sweetie came into my view, and I just had to  bring her home with me:

No, she isn't as "glamorous" as my previous bag, but she has served me well.  When I carry this lovely bag, I am highly organized and stylish at the same time, and isn't that what is really important?      Well, maybe so, but my loyalty only lasted until last Friday, when  (lo and behold!)  I found myself back in the purse section.     Then, I saw her!     She was exquisite, and waiting for me.    The brand was "Simply Vera" by Vera Wang, but there was nothing "simple" about her.   Her lavendar, smooth exterior and snakeskin-like handle were intoxicating.   I had to have her.    Feast your eyes on my current infatuation:

She is simply awesome, and fits perfectly on my shoulder.   Now, do I have reasoning for such a purchase?   Not this time.  I'm just in love.......wicked, wonderful purse love.

So that's my dirty little secret  (well, one of them).       I'm not sure when my hunger for more will strike again, but when it does,  I think I may branch out.   Louis Vuitton perhaps???
Thursday
Aug262010

Me Again

I know, third post, first day.     Maybe I'm a little too enthusiastic.      I thought I'd write a little bit about how I ended up  here in Lost Wages   (er, I mean Las Vegas) Nevada.     I moved here five years ago from bum-fucked Egypt   (that's McClure, Ohio).      I'm not dissing Ohio   (and McClure IS the radish capital of the world, or so they claim!)  but I was bouncing off the corn stalks there and had to leave.    I actually planned and prepared to move here for at least 18 months prior to moving.    I had to worry about money and changing jobs and selling everything in our house, including our house.    The hardest part was (ever so slowly and methodically) convincing Joan, my partner, that we should move to the desert.    I can recall using excuses like,  "Your sinus headaches should all but diminish in a much drier climate, Honey!",  and,  "I could be much closer to both the boys if we lived out West, Honey!".    Something you should know about Joan is that she is one tough cookie.   She has education and common sense, which makes her a really, really hard sell !!   So try as I might, I think she gave in just to shut me up and not because I convinced her.    I'm the adventurous one.   She's the careful and sensible one.  I'm the crazy one.   She's the sane one.    I'm the fun one.   She's the...........hmmm, maybe I should shut up now, huh, Honey?

Anyway, we are here and have been for five years.   A lot has happened in those five years.   I'll write more about that later on, a little at a time.   We both like living here, although there are some drawbacks for sure.    We have no relatives closer than 700 miles, and the only friends we've made have been through work, so far.   People are funny here in that they keep to themselves.   I couldn't tell you any of my neighbors names; hell, I am not even sure I know what they look like.   We all just get in our cars and go our own ways.     Joan and I have been planning  to attend a Coffee Social that is held by the "Bettys"  (a lesbian social group) one Sunday each month.    Every month goes by, and we somehow "forget" to go.  So, it's basically our faults that we don't have a social life here.     Maybe it'll be like starting this blog..........one day I'll make like Nike and "just do it".   OK enough about how we got here.    The weather is great 9 months out of the year, the restaurants are abundant, the gambling is everywhere and there's always a new show to check out.   Now, if I can just get a job, maybe we can afford to do some of that stuff!   I've been laid off almost a year.  Las Vegas leads the nation with the highest unemployment rate.     It's tough out there.
Thursday
Aug262010

It's Raining...It's Pouring....The Old Man is Snoring....

Please forgive me my silliness, but I'm almost giddy with excitement!  (yea I said giddy, so sue me)    It is Raining outside, and I live in Las Vegas!    My friends, this is a rare and wonderful occasion in our city.      Sure, this time of year, we are considered to be in "monsoon" season, but that's a big laugh.      We get a little more than single-digit humidity and, by golly, we're having a monsoon!      Anyway, I love it when the thunder and rain comes.    It drops the temperature for a few minutes, for one thing, and the air smells so nice!   Most of the summer, we walk around in a "blast furnace", and it literally hurts to breath in the air.   But after the (very short) rain, everything looks and smells clean and it reminds me of greener places.      I really dread our summers here, but from September through May, we have the most glorious weather in the nation, I am sure of it.
Thursday
Aug262010

Hello world!

First day.   First blogging comment.   No idea what to say.   So here goes.   I've been thinking about writing a blog for a couple years now, and can't believe I'm really actually starting one.     As you can tell in the title, I am not sure where this blog will go.    I guess the first thing I should do is introduce myself.    My name is Terri.   I'm 56 years old, live in Las Vegas with my partner of 13 years, Joan.   I have two grown sons and three exceptionally handsome grandsons.     I was born in Tennessee and raised mostly in the suburbs of Atlanta.     I have a B.S in Business Administration...............oh wait, this is not a job application, is it?     Dang.  I'm also Unemployed, and spend a large part of every day filling out online applications.      Yes, I am one of those statistics, a product of our economy.    I am a democrat, and yes, I still believe in what Obama is trying to do, although I am disappointed that more hasn't been done.   I'll talk more about me later.    For now, I'd like to address those folks out there who may Not want to be following my Blog.  To make it interesting, if not a bit amusing, I've formed a Top Ten List of sorts  (ok, it's only a list of 5, but Top Five List didn't sound cool), of those kinds of people who should just find some other blog to read and not even bother with mine:

1.     If you are a homophobe, you may not want to read this blog.

2.     If you think anyone over 50 would have nothing important to say, you may not want to read this blog.

3.     If you hate kids, you definitely won't want to read this blog, because I plan on bragging about my kids and grandkids A LOT.

4.     If you don't like raw, honest talk about sex and life in general, you may not want to read this blog.  I don't know a better way to put that than just to say it outright.    I'm gonna talk about those things.

5.     If you are a BIGOT,  please just stay off my friggin blog, ok?   Thanks..........

OK there ya go.    I really hope I can get some free-flowing thoughts going here, and some honest self-expression.  I have always kept a journal, my whole life, so expressing myself through writing comes naturally to me.    Writing is my place of refuge and my therapy.     Where I lack in grammar/spelling techniques,  I will hopefully make up for in "heart".     So Blog On..............
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