Happy Monday! I’m linking up with the lovely Stasha over at The Good Life for Monday Listicles. This week’s list is Ten Sounds that Drive Me Bonkers. You know, like nails on a blackboard (but that's not in my list) and your nagging wife or husband (not MY wife, oh no), or even screaming babies on an airplane (not so bad as long as you are sitting 12 rows away...in another airplane). No, I've made my own unique list that's bound to entertain and delight. I know! I know! You can't wait, right? So let's get down to it, people.
Ten Sounds that Drive me Bonkers:
I hate the gulping sound. You know, the gulping when someone gulps their water or beer.
Makes me want to drown myself. Or someone. Drives me Bonkers. Some serious bone-fide Bonkers.
I hate the sound of Long, Wet, Snot-filled nose blows.
Makes me want to set a box of tissue on fire. Drives me Bugger Bonkers.
I hate the sound of anyone smacking their gum.
Makes me want to fill their mouths with spackle. Drives me freakin Bonkers.
I hate the sound of popcorn munchers and soda slurpers sitting right behind me at the movies.
Makes me want to fart really loud. Munch that, bitches. I don’t go Bonkers…I get even!
I hate that gawd-awful sound the Emergency Broadcast System makes across the TV screen.
Makes me want to throw something. Through the TV. Or the window. Or the freaking TV station’s window. Yep, Bonkers.
I hate the screechy sound a fork and knife make on a plate.
Makes me want to stick one utensil in each ear. Of someone.
I hate the sound of paper money being counted by a cashier.
Especially when it’s not my money. If it was my money, I wouldn’t mind a bit.
I hate the sound of someone popping bubble wrap.
Makes me want to pop them upside their bubble heads.
I hate the sound of the freakin motorcycle outside my apartment at freakin 3 in the freakin morning.
Makes me want to kick the freakin shit out of the freakin guy riding it. Only he’s a big freakin freak and I’m a big freakin skeerdy cat. Drives me nuts. Freakin Bonkers as a matter of fact.
I hate the sound of a Whiner.
What? Shut up. I’m not whining! I’m making a list. Stasha told me to. So there.