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« WTFriday - Never thought I'd see the day | Main | Monday Listicles - One hour in the day of an old unemployed broad »
Wednesday
May092012

My ABCs

This week I became the stalker of Ducky.  Ok that sounds weirder than it really is.  Let me back up just a step or two.  

Ducky is a blogger.  Hilarious blogger.  She’s a youngun, somewhere in her early 30s I think.  She visited my blog one day and I fell in bloggy love.  She’s way past funny; she’s a master at the humor craft, that one!  I’m in awe. 

OK enough gushing about Ducky.  But her website is called Batcrap Crazy.  I think that’s really all that needs to be said. 

Except.

I don’t normally blog on Wednesday, but I’m feeling especially generous with sharing myself today.  You lucky people!   However, I want to make it quick because I have homework, job hunting, exercise, shower, and finishing The Hunger Games to do today.   Yes, I’m probably the only person in the universe that has not finished said book yet.  So sue me.  I have to study and that requires a shitload of reading.  I get sick of reading.

Until I picked up The Hunger Games.  Oh my goshness!  I am so hooked.   We are going to see the movie Saturday and I cannot wait.

So back to today’s post.  I give you the ABC's of me. Stolen from Ducky who stole them from Donna. Um, just the context not the content. I kept most of the subjects, but also added a few of my own.  I'm a rebel like that. 

So here we go:

The ABCs of me

Age:  58  and somewhat comfortable in this age. I could do without the arthritis and occasional sneeze-piddles though.

Bedsize:   Queen.  Suits my lofty and pretentious attitude.

Chores that you hate:   Not enough room on here to list.  The one I hate the most is vacuuming.  Fucking Freaking hate it with a fucking freaking passion.  Fucking Freaking vacuuming.  I’m in a bad mood now.  Thanks.

Diapers:   Not yet.  Good thing, too, since I couldn’t afford them.

Essential start to my day:  Caffeine and a crane, to get my broke-ass outta bed.

Favorite Color:   RED.  Baby, I love me some red.  A curvaceous woman in a long red dress.  OY

Gold or Silver:  Yes and Yes.  Yes to Diamonds and sapphires too.   Hells yes.

Height:   5’6”.   I used to be 5’7 ½” but got in a rollover when I was 38.  Compression fractures.  Ouch. 

Instruments you play:  I can pick my nose rhythmically.  Does that count?   Oh yea, and I can whistle with my fingers.   I had a butch friend teach me that right after I came out.  So far it hasn’t gotten me laid.  Dang.

Job Title:  My job is looking for a job.  I am 2.5 years into it now and have reached the Expert Level.  Go ahead, test me.

Kids:  I have two sons, 38 and 29 and three grandsons, 6, 10 and 16.  Still waiting and hoping for a granddaughter.

Living:   Yes, thank God.  Considering the alternative.  I’m happy with my current status.  Alive.

Music:  My iPod has everything from hot Jennifer Lopez to Smokey Robinson and the Miracles to the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack.  I am a music fan of gargantuan proportions. 

Nicknames:  Terri, now.  Growing up it was Katie.  Or Shithead when my mom was drunk.

Own or Rent:   I own my soul.  I own my mistakes.  I own my opinions.  I own my successes.  You can’t rent that stuff people.

Pet Peeves:  Whiny bitches, liars, tailgaters, know-it-all’s.  Oh yea, and food-smackers.  Keep it shut Paaalllease.

Quote from movie or TV Show: "I like it a lot”  from Dumb and Dumber.  Don’t judge.   It totally fits in so many instances.  Think about it.

Righty or Lefty:   I’m always right.  If you don’t believe me, just ask me.  I’ll corroborate.

Siblings: The cutest little 4’11” Sissy you have ever seen.  She is freaking adorable. 

Time: - Need more.  Never get enough.  If only we could Clone time.  That would be awesome.

Underwear:  Yes, for cryin out loud.  And?  Sometimes Granny panties.  Shut up.  But.  I apologize for the visuals.  Send me your eye-doctor bill.

Vegetable you hate:   OKRA

What makes you run late:   Never EVER late.  That’s the one part of Type A personality I seem to have adopted.  Everything else gleans from my B side.  Thank God.

X-rays you've had:  You name it.  I’m 58.  Do the math.

Yummy food you make:  My family loves my mashed potatoes, gravy and biscuits and meat loaf.  I love it when I don’t have to cook.  I win most of the time.

Zoo animal:   Bengal Tiger.  Grrrrrr.  Fits my personality.  Or at least my “made-up” one.

 

So, what are the ABCs of you?  Hmmm?  I’m dying to know.  Give it up.

Image from Google Images

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