Wednesday
Jun012011
Poking Fun Really Is Fun
Wednesday, June 1, 2011 at 12:14AM
Can I be funny without poking fun at myself? The answer is a resounding No. Who doesn’t want to laugh at another’s expense? I do! I do! I even like laughing at my own expense. I think there may be a very disturbing diagnosis for what ails me out there somewhere. I’m not going to go looking for it, though, for fear of straight-jackets and shock treatments and Nurse Ratchet (bless her heart and that hairdo. You have seen that old movie, right?).
Seriously, I find self-deprecation a fun way to draw attention to myself, and I love being the center of attention. Since I don’t have my stellar looksperky boobage anymore I have to go with my wit. I must say, I was a bit jealous of several of my young bloggy friends when they posted their “Senior Hottie” pictures. I’m so old I couldn’t find mine. Maybe they didn’t have cameras back then. Or proms. Or hotties.
The fact of the matter is, I am a senior hottie. Well, I’m a senior. The hottie part only comes in when I’m sitting at a video poker machine, alongside a 90 year old man who keeps winking at me (it could happen). I feel pretty hot then. And, since I like to tease, I continue the hotness by rather coyly moving to the next machine over. Am I playing cat and mouse? Uh... no. But that would be a much funnier scenario than the fact that he probably doesn’t smell all that good so I just need to remove my delicate nose tissues to a safe zone outside the radiation area.
I hate the word “Senior”. I guess it beats old, geriatric, retired, tired, wrinkled, gray, sweetie, honey, and my personal fave, “Elderly”. And when did I become a senior anyway? I’m 57 and I still like rock music. Ok it’s classic rock and the Rolling Stones, and they are fossils. But still. In Vegas, it seems the senior age starts at 55. Somebody forgot to tell the AARP about that because I started receiving their recruitment flyersads for funeral homes when I turned 49. I still haven’t joined. I’m a rebel that way. I will decide when I am old, and if I’m not ready to be old, the AARP doesn’t have enough muscle to make me old. Those bullies!
So back to the “Senior Hottie” idea. Yes, I am a Senior Hottie too. Apparently, I’m considered a sweet young thing in my circles. But I’m still not giving it up to that 90 year old man. I have standards, you know. I’m just going to put that out there right now. And so….
OLD DUDES: Do not sit down beside me at the video poker machine unless you 1) Have a seriously large bank account, a Mercedes and a mansion, 2) Just want me on your arm for eye-candy, because I am not having sex with you, and, 3) can still drive and hold your water. If you can’t handle my rules, you can’t handle me. Well… unless Rule Number 1 is substantial. Then we can negotiate.
Seriously, I find self-deprecation a fun way to draw attention to myself, and I love being the center of attention. Since I don’t have my stellar looks
The fact of the matter is, I am a senior hottie. Well, I’m a senior. The hottie part only comes in when I’m sitting at a video poker machine, alongside a 90 year old man who keeps winking at me (it could happen). I feel pretty hot then. And, since I like to tease, I continue the hotness by rather coyly moving to the next machine over. Am I playing cat and mouse? Uh... no. But that would be a much funnier scenario than the fact that he probably doesn’t smell all that good so I just need to remove my delicate nose tissues to a safe zone outside the radiation area.
I hate the word “Senior”. I guess it beats old, geriatric, retired, tired, wrinkled, gray, sweetie, honey, and my personal fave, “Elderly”. And when did I become a senior anyway? I’m 57 and I still like rock music. Ok it’s classic rock and the Rolling Stones, and they are fossils. But still. In Vegas, it seems the senior age starts at 55. Somebody forgot to tell the AARP about that because I started receiving their recruitment flyers
So back to the “Senior Hottie” idea. Yes, I am a Senior Hottie too. Apparently, I’m considered a sweet young thing in my circles. But I’m still not giving it up to that 90 year old man. I have standards, you know. I’m just going to put that out there right now. And so….
OLD DUDES: Do not sit down beside me at the video poker machine unless you 1) Have a seriously large bank account, a Mercedes and a mansion, 2) Just want me on your arm for eye-candy, because I am not having sex with you, and, 3) can still drive and hold your water. If you can’t handle my rules, you can’t handle me. Well… unless Rule Number 1 is substantial. Then we can negotiate.
Reader Comments (20)
Killer post! Loved it! There are senior hotties posts and I wasn't invitied??? AARP is stilll chasing me....I just file their stuff in the circular file!
I love your posts. you are a hottie~
If liking classic rock makes you old, I'm in deep do-do. Just sayin'.
As for the Old Dude Rules - LOL!!
I posted those Senior Hottie pics, and managed feel old as I read everyone elses' that graduated in the 90's. I was getting married and having a baby by then. Yikes!
My phone doesn't have skype, internet, or a touch screen. Those Cricket phones whose only feature is numbers that can be seen from the space station is the next logical step. I feel like a fossil.
You are a hottie with a P.H.D. ( and funny too) Those young folks are so high school. Hugs Mary
I know, you'd think the AARP would give up with all the mailings. They could have saved a fortune on me on mailing costs alone. Thanks for stopping by Eva!
No you're the hottie. I'm just having hot flashes. Hugs
Loved everyone Senior Hottie pictures! Funny thing is (and some of you don't realize this) you are all much more beautiful now than back then. Yea I said it.
Today I actually do feel a bit 'fossilesque' (yea I made it up and I like it). My arthritis is fighting with my tendonitis to take over my sanity. I have sore places I didn't even know I had places.
I have a phone that does everything except my dishes. I'm addicted. Just another 12 step program to start on.
Oh, Boy, Miss Thang,
You can always make me smile :)
BTW, didn't you get the memo?
57 is the new 40, babe!!
xx Kiss from Mn.
What's a P.H.D? And is it terminal? Do I have time to work my bucket list first? I'm too busy studying to be a hottie. I haven't figured out my hottie meter yet, but I'm willing to bet it's up there. You just can't bring a good woman down (well you can, but it involves cash and booze and begging).
XOXO's
That's freaking awesome! So does that mean I can chase after younger women now? Oh wait, I do that already.
Signed with love and kisses
from
Miss Thang
You are a *humorous* hottie!
I've been trying to convince Jim to join AARP. I'm not old enough, but he is ... and I want the discounts!
Thanks Lisa. I'll take any kind of hottie compliment I can get. LOL
Love, love, love this! I too am at my best when poking fun at me. I have issues with the same types of dudes, and I'm only a year into my 40's, so I'm a little scared! By the way, my momma is 61, still a total hottie, and my bestest friend. She lives it up more and has more fun than most of my social circle who are closer to me in age, and she looks the part. As I get ready for another day in the office, she and dad are off to the beach to party hard for 4 days with a football fan club : ). I'm looking forward to getting there!
Hello Hawley! Yea it's not so bad being me. My 50s have been all about new discoveries and change, in both of which I thrive. Your Mom sounds awesome! And so do you. Thanks!
Terri, haven't you heard?
Self-deprecation is the new HOT.
You are so cutting edge...xoxo
Cutting edge..........yea, that's me. LOL Thanks Julie
Great post, Terri. Last time I was a hottie, it was just those dang power-surges!
I hear ya, Selena! Gotta love those power surges. Thanks for stopping by! Much appreciated.