I love logging onto Face Book every Thursday and enjoying the cool pictures my friends and relatives post for Throwback Thursday. They post everything from their kids when they were small to their pets dressed up like Elvis. Some pictures are really hilarious. I have some witty and clever Face Book friends! Today I joined the fun by posting one of my very favorite pictures of my boys from 1983 (below for those of you who don’t follow me on Face Book).
Viewing old photos also reminds me that I’m getting older by the minute. However, this reaction is not caused by the photos, as you are probably thinking, but rather the fact that I have to put my reading glasses on just to see the photos. Things like that happen when you’re a woman of a certain age.
In further news, you may remember my posting about getting a new iPhone for my 60th birthday, which has already been six months. Oh my God, I’m 60 and a half now!
The last few weeks, I have had a lot of trouble reading or viewing anything on my iPhone. It’s not the phone, people. My eyes are aging right along with the rest of my sorry-assed sagging body. I have to put on some reading glasses just to dial a number. Of course, that is providing I can find my reading glasses. Sometimes I dial or text things that make people go “Hmmm?”
I’ve been known to text a male co-worker that I need to make an appointment with my gynecologist. That text should have gone to my sister. Conversely, I sent a text just recently that asked one of my best friends if I can take some time off at the end of the month. Obviously, that one was meant for my boss.
And you don’t even want to know who I’ve blind-dialed. That’s kind of like butt-dialing, only using the bad eyesight instead of the butt. I’ve called for pizza at 8 am in the morning. I’ve called a creditor back that I’ve been avoiding like the plague, and quickly hung up once I realized my faux pas. I called the DMV instead of my Dad.
It was out of control. I was out of control.
Being the “take immediate action, damn the consequences” kind of girl I am, I decided it was time to say a fond farewell to my precious, coveted iPhone. After bidding Siri a poignant goodbye and assuring her the problem was not her, but me, I went to Verizon.com to search for a phone with a much larger viewing display.
I didn’t have to look long, because there she was, in all her splendor! The Galaxy 4S smart phone with a 5 inch display screen, which was 1.5 inches larger than the iPhone. After perusing all the other phones, I knew she was the one for me, so I ordered her to be delivered overnight. I didn’t want to wait one second longer than I had to for this sexy new device. I was smitten.
The next day, FedEx delivered my new toy and I jumped for joy. I may have even done a little happy dance in front of the delivery guy. He left rather quickly after I signed for the package. Hope I didn’t scare him. He’s probably never seen a sexy senior citizen with those kinds of moves. Just sayin..
But I digress.
As soon as I closed the door, I tore into that package, and within a couple of minutes, I installed the battery and activated the phone. I was almost breathless as I turned her on and held her in my hands. She was huge. She was beautiful. I was weak with the sweetness of it all.
The waters parted. The angels started singing. The sun came out. My heart skipped a beat.
I could actually SEE my phone! I could read every word. I could see the numbers on the key pad. I could even tell the difference between people in group photos.
It was mind-blowing, people. I was a changed woman.
So what if I wasn’t one of the cool kids that purchase every Apple product that was ever invented within minutes of its launch.
Now I’m just an Android girl with a Fucking Fabulous Phone that I can actually see.
Gosh I love technology.
Call me uncool. Call me old.
But at least when haters do call me, I will be able to see the Reject button.